Perspective

20th August, 2022 - Blog

What’s up, all? I’ve been quiet with blogging recently (and incredibly busy with work), but I’m back today because… uh… well because I’m signed off work and I feel a little useless.

A couple of weeks back, I passed out twice in the same day. Not great, as you can imagine, so I checked through my Apple Watch’s data and found that my heart rate is low — like, unnaturally low.

After fainting again (yikes) and a few trips to the doctors, I’m now awaiting a heart monitor. It looks like I have bradycardia, which is causing my heart to struggle to push oxygen to my brain, causing dizziness and what I can only describe as being travel sick and unable to focus for 24 hours a day.

It’s, uh, it’s not great. I can’t work out, I’ve been told to take time off work, and worst of all, even lifting my son leaves me out of breath.

It’d be fair to say I’ve been trying to do too much recently, but I didn’t realise that working out fairly regularly for a decade would actually negatively impact my heart (although admittedly, it probably doesn’t help that I’m so tall so the blood has further to go).

I’m trying to get out of the house each day and walk (since there’s no way I can run), but I’m just in a perpetual state of exhaustion. Still, at least the area is nice.

As a result, though, you can expect some more blogs in the near future, and if the ones about fitness have bored you, then good news – there won’t be many of those for a while!

It sure puts things in perspective. Working out may seem like a small thing for most, but for me it’s my “me time”. As someone that has huge mental health issues tied to self-perception, this is tough to swallow. As a workaholic that’s not allowed to work right now, it’s hitting doubly hard.

As I said at the start of this post, I just feel a bit useless. I’m not able to do much around the house (going up the stairs leaves me exhausted), and not being able to work makes me feel like I’m not helping my team, or my family.

Here’s hoping to hear about the next stage soon, but thanks to everyone that’s checked in on me so far.

Onward, upward, I hope.